Jeez, I don’t know what all the other Muses are whining about this week. Writing paralysis that makes you bake cookies? Only getting two sentences on the page in a day? Not me. Nope. When I sit down to do the ole’ clickity-clack, the waters are flat’n’glassy.

*Smiles*Teeth twinkle*

I’ll let you in on my little secret and The Muses’ most recent endeavor: NVR-SLUMP®. The all new, all herbal, 100% guaranteed cure to the writing woes. 

Every morning, I pop a NVR-SLUMP® with my O.J. and a spoonful of FEAR-B-GONE and I get pleasant harbor for a full 24 hours.

You see, NVR-SLUMP® protects from:

• Those bruised clouds of doubt lingering on the horizon.
• The puke-inducing freefalls of neuroses such as “Am I ever going to finish?” and/or “Am I really good enough?”
• That frequent cringing caused by navigating the rocky seas of (yet another) revision and/or the squalls associated with first drafts.

Sounds perfect, huh? It is.

Though, in full disclosure, below is the list of NVR-SLUMP® side effects (stupid precedent set by those stupid E.D. ads on the stupid TV). Please ignore this and just skip ahead. Seriously, these warnings are not important at all.

• Removing paralyzing fear may result in boring stories, flat plots, and ho-hum characters.
• Without a steady stream of doubts, you may experience isolation from other writers who no longer have any connection to your placidity.
• NVR-SLUMP® may leave you with a feeling of lack of accomplishment.
• Studies have shown that NVR-SLUMP® also eliminates any highs experienced in writing. 
• Do not take NVR-SLUMP® if you wish to continue to enjoy writing. Do not take NVR-SLUMP® if you are proud to be a writer. Do not take NVR-SLUMP® if you love the moments when you finish that draft – or nail that line – or that character really starts to pop – because this wonder drug will take away all of it in a pretty gel cap.
• Make sure to consult your critique group before taking NVR-SLUMP®.

Interested? I thought so. Unfortunately, NVR-SLUMP® hasn’t received “FDA Approval” as of yet, so you’ll have to duck over to Tijuana or Cuba or Canada to get your hands on the stuff. But, believe me, it’s TOTALLY worth it.

Bottoms up.

Poor prose... Weak characters... Slow plot... Tight deadlines... Harsh criticism... Too many risks on the page... Not enough. Any of this strike a chord?

Writer's block boils down to the same core emotion: fear

Yesterday, Talia had a great list of suggestions to jump start the writing, and on Tuesday, Katy talked about riding out the slump by taking some time off. They're both right. Getting out of writer's block is basically a matter of doing anything that will remove, or at least diminish, your writing fears.

What's the answer for you? Is it a walk around the block to help you relax? A phone call with a good friend? A day or two off? For me, it's silence.

Last week, I talked about heading to a secluded location to write. The first time I went there, I was in the throes of writer's block. Really, truly, I was in knots. Whenever I sat down to work, a panicky, anxious feeling settled in my lungs and my shoulders crept up, little by little, until they were right next to my ears. Stress much?

When I feel this way, my answer is to escape. Give me a good, long stretch of time, a change of scenery, and quiet, and it's like the frenzy of the world slows, and slows, and slows and suddenly I feel it again. That mellow buzz of the writing high. I see the places and the characters. I am the characters. They're with me, and we are fearless.

This week we're writing about writer's block.  It's the dark side of publishing, those unproductive times when we struggle to get a decent word on the page.  And while I have had those days where it takes eight hours to get two sentences on the page, or even those where I end up with a negative word count for the day, those days are in the minority.  I think that more often then not my writer's block is something else entirely: procrastination.

Procrastination ranges from an hour spent on Twitter before I ever open WORD, to several weeks where I never even open my manuscript.  Occasionally, I tell myself that I'm composting, letting my subconscious rest until inspiration hits.  Other times, I'm more honest about the fact that I just don't know what comes next or I'm afraid I can't make sense of things.

The fix is simple: open the manuscript and start typing.  The fix is hard:  Open the manuscript?  But I just found this link to 150 pages of drama on Goodreads (and I have no idea what comes next).

Writing first drafts is especially painful for me.  I hate staring at blank pages. All that white is terrifying.  But I also love discovering those moments and details I didn't know about until they appeared on the page.So eventually, I suck it up and open the document.

Here are some things that have helped me keep procrastination at bay:

1.  Set goals: setting a realistic goal can motivate you to complete it.  On weekends, when I write, I usually give  myself a goal of 1500 or 2000 words.  By the time, I hit that goal, I'm usually in the middle of a scene or chapter and in a rhythm that keeps me writing even more.  Realistic is the key.  If you set a goal of 10,000 words in a day, you're setting yourself up for disappointment.

2.  Enlist other writers to cheer you on:  Have a #wordwar with other writers online (see who can write the most words in an hour). Talk to your writing friends about how you feel.  Commit yourself to sending a new scene to your critique partner at the end of the day. 

3.  Set deadlines:  Deadlines are great motivators. You don't have to wait for a publisher to dictate your writing schedule- set your own. Give yourself rewards when you hit the deadline. 

4.  Skip ahead:  When I am stuck at a particular scene, it sometimes helps for me to jump forward to a scene that comes later. I'm making forward progress, and often times I'll figure out what needs to come before by writing the later scene.

5.  Read:  Some writers don't like to read while they write a draft, but reading is what got me interested in writing in the first place.  A great book inspires me every time.

6.  Do some character/writing exercises:  On days when writing a scene feels too challenging, I can usually handle a character worksheet or brainstorming session.  The discoveries I make through writing exercises usually get me excited to jump back into the manuscript.

7.  Give yourself permission to suck:  There is freedom in suckage.  You can always fix it later.

8.  Change locations:  take your computer outside, head to a coffee shop, or just move to the other side of the couch.  A change of location can change your attitude. 

9.  Edit yesterday's work.  Editing uses a different muscle.  If you can't bring yourself to face the blank page, start with one that's already got words on it, and finesse it before moving on to the next scene.

10.  When all else fails, take a break.  You're a writer.  You won't be able to stay away forever.  Besides, your family misses you. 

Ugh.  Writer’s block.  I seem to be facing it now, writing this post.  How can a few paragraphs encompass the ugly morass of absolute horror that is a writing slump?  And how do I even begin to write my way out of it?

I guess I’ll start with the only way that’s coming to mind at the moment.  A story.  A little anecdote.  A harrowing exposure into my own life and mind.

Several months ago, I wallowed my way into the worst case of writer’s block I’ve ever encountered.  This wasn’t just fear of the blank page.  Or even the fear of Book 2 that I felt last week.  This was like I had been cut off from my writing.  Like it had been severed from me – amputated – and I didn’t even feel the phantom limb.

It was like being lost.  Not lost as it would be now, carrying my trusty iPhone and its GPS in my pocket.  Not even lost like I was once or twice in Europe after I graduated from college.  It was like being lost as a child, in a sea of unknown.

And like a child, all I could do was cry.

Now, I don’t know about you, but I face writer’s block a lot.  I’m still facing it now, with Book 2.  I’m feeling my way through the dark with that one.  But at least I have a sense that there is a light somewhere.  I know, intuitively, where I need to be.  I know, from my editor’s notes, what needs to be done.  And I have faith (for the moment) that I’ll find my way.

But back then, I had no intuition.  I had no faith.  Perhaps if I’d talked to my editor (who is the most remarkably kind and understanding person, and who talked me off a ledge with the beginning to Book 3).  But really, how do you phone up a publishing professional and cry at her?  I couldn’t even talk to Bret when he called.

I can hear you all cringing out there.  Have you been through this?  Does the very idea strike terror in your hearts?  Do you want the answer?

I know I did.

Unfortunately, I don’t really have one.  But I can tell you what happened.  I shut down my documents.  Every single one.  I didn’t even post on the blog that week.  I couldn’t face the written word – at least none of the words I had written.  So I cleaned.  I baked cookies.  I took care of my family.  I went on long, long walks.  I seized every encouraging word and e-mail like a life raft.

I cried.

And the worst didn’t come.

It didn’t last forever.

Our theme this week is “Pulling Out of the Slump”.  And I have all sorts of tricks and advice for dragging my own idle carcass out of a little slump.  The best for me, right now, is “Just keep writing.”  I have a deadline.  I’ll feel my way out eventually.

St. George slaying the Dragon

But that.  That was…something else.  And the best thing I did then was just stop writing.  Athletes, when they’re injured, stay off the field.  I don’t know what kind of injury I sustained.  I don’t know how to prevent it from happening again.  But I stayed off the field, and now I’m back in the game.

Let me just say that I hope this never happens to you.  But if it does, think of this, and take some time off.  It is hard – so hard – to start up again, facing the fear.  But the time I spent not writing was worth it.

I LOVE this cover. It completely captures the essence of the story with one amazing image. Just look at all those chaotic voices pushing into her ear! And isn't she absolutely stunning?

So what do YOU think?
Donna